segunda-feira, março 17, 2008

You know how negativity spreads? Don't contribute to it!

There is a certain family (who's son is sweet and lovely and I have nothing against) who has done nothing but complain about our school the whole year; the school "breaks up friendships" because the classes have to be remixed each year, the toys are not new, the class room "is shit," when we send notes home around the children's necks it's "horrible," and the school is always asking for money or donations for some thing or another. I've about had it up to the moon with these people, trying to placate their constant complaints just so I won't have to listen to them anymore. You'd think I was a horrible teacher, that the school was the worst kind, and that no one knew how to treat children. You'd also think that if they hated American styled schooling so much, they wouldn't have put their child in am American school. Makes sense.... This is not a case of this-is-our-district-school-and-we-have-to-send-our-kid-there - it's a private school and they can take the kid out and send them somewhere else any time.

In contrast, I have some wonderful parents who constantly want to know what they can do with their child at home to help him follow what he's learning in school, say they agree 100% with time out for hitting or breaking rules, and seem to genuinely TRUST the school and teachers to TEACH their child. And to give them limits.

Now, unfortunately, it's true that teachers try very hard not to treat the student based on the feelings about the parents, but it can happen. And at the end of the day, which child would you rather spend time talking to and interacting with? The one who's parents trust you and think you're doing the right thing, or the one who's parents think you don't know how to properly treat their child? Which child are you going to to out of your way for to enhance a teachable moment? Which child are you going to spend more time explaining the right and wrong way to? It should be all equal, I know, but sometimes when you have a class full of crazy kids, you hate to waste your effort and love on a child who's parents think you are horrible and don't trust what you teach or say.

I'm not saying that you always have to agree with your child's teacher or the teacher will not treat the child fairly, but think about the negativity you spread with constant complaints, and then think about where the negativity will spread to next, and you may see how much damage it can do.

3 comentários:

Unknown disse...

The apple doesn't far from the tree. I so bet that these kids are personally experiencing this negativity in their own lives. I bet that they are learning to be negative themselves, and that one day, they're gonna make iddy biddy negative children of their own. What a sad thing this is, and I imagine it is very frustrating as an educator.

pamela disse...

are the complaining parents involved at all? i'm guessing not.

AkuTyger disse...

Generally not. They appear at school only when something is wrong (child seems to not be eating enough at snack time, there was a stain on the uniform, a letter was sent home asking for money for a fundraiser and the parents don't want to give money) and only to complain. In this entire year, I can't think of one positive thing that this particular family has ever said to me.

What is amazing is that the kid himself is wonderful and considerate, and generally better behaved than Brasilian kids in general.