sábado, outubro 07, 2006

Politics. I used to live for Politics. Maybe that's because I was force fed Public Radio when I was a kid, rollerskating in the basement of the Natural Science building at MSU while my mother sorted dead insects in alcohol, deep in a lab full of large aquariums of fish, with the radio as our only vocal company. Little did I know I would mirror this almost to a T less than 7 years later, except my bugs would be rotting on sticky traps and my lab had no nice windows, being in the middle of the building, well below the ground, and severely lacking in fish. Maybe it's because I came of age at a time that was not major election year, but was given my first chance to vote for president when Nader was my choice, and all the controversy that followed wasn't my fault because I wasn't a resident of Florida. Maybe it's because in college we all try to stretch our political wings and become disillusioned with our own independence, thinking we can actually change the world, participating in rallies, painting the rock, writing things in chalk in the middle of the night.

When I first moved here, I couldn't live without NPR. I logged onto the internet nearly every single night, using our free dialup between 12am and 6am when the phone rates were cheaper, only to be frustrated by the unbelievably slow connection and the choppy feed. After Velox (AV) I used to log on and listen to "wait wait don't tell me" every Sunday while I expressed breast milk for Ju to have the next day when I went back to work. Even with my pathetic laptop speakers, it was better than being in the dark. I read Google news everyday, I followed common stories and read several versions just to get the facts strait from the leaning of the author, whether left or right.

And then suddenly, I just didn't care anymore, or something, because by the time I knew what happened in New Orleans, it had been happening for almost a week and been the talk of the country for just as long. Somehow, being a mother perhaps, I have become more and more indifferent, since I can't do anything specifically, and I have more central things to worry about, more significant things that cry when he's tired and tries to eat crayons if I don't watch him, and who really is affected by every decision I make.

Maybe that is why when it comes to Brasilian politics, which I should care about, which have consumed so many conversations of my friends, I am in the dark and not so bothered by it. If I were a voting citizen, sure I would have to pay attention. But as it stands, I cannot have any affect on what happens, and the need to know and understand is heavily shadowed by the immense stress and difficulty of reading/hearing/watching it all in Portuguese. By the time I have looked up one word I missed, the news report is finished, or I have forgotten what the main point of the article was, and then my indifference seems more justified. Why waste my time doing this when I have so many enjoyable things to occupy my few precious minutes here and there.

Hopefully there will be no military coupe or whatnot.

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